I know

I know I made my mistakes..

I know I deserve to be treated this way

I know I deserve to not even talk to you

I know I deserve to be called hypocrite by you

I know I deserve to be disappear in front of you.

Things you said behind me is good enuf for me to understand how much you dislike me being around.

I understood and capture it.

I felt guilt already.. No matter how much I smile it could not cover up the pain I have inside me. one Friend that are real close to me can see that I am in pain and walked to me and tell me dont worry "Feli, everything will be alright, in life there's up and down.. dun let ur emoness kill overtake the joyful smile away. Remember you always have God to go to and friends to lend shoulder from. Be strong be it physical or emotionally".

I realize is never easy to be strong. I maybe strong from the outlook but not inside. I am darn tired with my emotions especially wen I'm alone at home.

You too must stay strong.. =)

This song makes me feel calm. Especially the lyrics. ♥♥♥♥♥♥

Amy Grant - Carry You

Lay down your burden, I will carry you
I will carry you, my child
Lay down your burden, I will carry you
I will carry you, my child, my child

If I can walk on water
And calm a restless sea
I've done a thousand things you've never done

And I'm weary watchin'
While you struggle on your own
Call my name, I'll come

Lay down your burden, I will carry you
I will carry you, my child
Lay down your burden, I will carry you
I will carry you, my child, my child

I give vision to the blind
And I can raise the dead
I've seen the darker side of Hell
And I returned
And I see these sleepless nights
And I count every tear you cry
I know some lessons hurt to learn

Lay down your burden, I will carry you
I will carry you, my child
Lay down your burden, I will carry you
I will carry you, my child, my child

I will carry you, my child

I see these sleepless nights
And I count every tear you cry
And call my name, I'll come runnin'

Lay down your burden, I will carry you
I will carry you, my child
Lay down your burden, I will carry you
I will carry you, my child, my child

I will carry you, my child, my child
I will carry you

Nerding mode ON

Exam is just next week. Will need to turn my nerd mode on! all the best to all year 2 & 3 students! =D


I gotta stop emoing for awhile and start focusing on studies! sigh~


Baby want you tell me why there is sadness in your eyes
I don't wanna say goodbye to you
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head

You're the one who set it up
Now you're the one to make it stop
I'm the one who's feeling lost right now
Now you want me to forget every little thing you said
But there is something left in my head

* CHORUS : I won't forget the way you're kissing
The feelings so strong were lasting for so long
But I'm not the man your heart is missing
That's why you go away I know

You were never satisfied no matter how I tried
Now you wanna say goodbye to me
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head

* REPEAT CHORUS

Sitting here all alone in the middle of nowhere
Don't know which way to go
There is so much to say now between us
There ain't so much for you
There ain't so much for me anymore

* REPEAT CHORUS

Before 2010 ends..

Hello Blogger..

Its already 31st December 2010. Time really flies, 2010 is coming to an end. For the past whole year I've learn a lot. Towards the end of the year is the most difficult months to me, but I do gain a lot. I'm hoping that next year will be a better year for me.
I sat down and think of the things I did in 2010. What have I achieved? I'm blessed that I have been walking with God throughout the whole year. I want to walk closer to Him.

This year memories there are sweet, bitter, and sour.. I wish that my memory will only store up those that are sweet, however, I know that the bitter and sour will still remain there. Memories hold and remain forever. It takes time to let go and forget the past and move on. I wish that time could just stop there and allow me to look back at what I did to reflect on myself. I have been very naive in my life. Immature in the things I do. Therefore, to all my friends out there especially my sistas! (you know who you are).. I would like to apologies for the wrong things I did throughout the year. I do hope to have a better memories with all of you. Past friends, present friends, future friends and I do hope it will be my forever friends. All of you created footprint in my life.. Loving you guys and girls~ especially my sistas and bro! =)


----------------------------------------------

Letting go the person you love sincerely is never easy. However, I know I gotta move on and carry on with life. Time will not stop there for me to cry over it and time will not tick backwards just for me to undo my mistakes. I know I will have to move on my life with this regret in me. Going to bed every night thinking why did I do that in the very first place. If only things would be different. Will I be able to forget you? I do not know how long more can I take up this pain. The pain that have been hunting me ever since that day itself. I will never forget the days we had the laughter and joy we shared and most importantly I will never forget the love you gave me and the love I received. I will always remember the best new year present ever you gave me that signifies our love and to begin my 2010. Even though I would have to end 2010 with this regret, I will still treasure the moments we had in the beginning. I know it will no longer be the same anymore., All I can do now is to surrender my pain to God and pray to God to relieve me from the thoughts that lead to depression. His timing is always perfect. No matter what, I do hope that you will be happy with the life you chose. Keeping you in my prayer list is all I can do now. Thank you for leaving your footprint in my life and allowing me to share the love you had. Your heart my heart our love...Will never forget this.. I do miss the moment we had together... Thank you for coloring up my life.

"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know" - Jeremiah 33 : 3



--------------------------------------------------------------------

"God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect" - Hebrews 11 : 40


-------------------------------------------------------------------

Before the year ends.. I would like to say..
I love you Mom and Dad..
I love you my friends!
I love you my brothers and sisters in Christ!
I love you all who have been here for me..
Thank you for everything..
God Is GOOD! =D

I LOVE YOU GOD. - Thank you for being with me and loving me unconditionally. Muaxx~

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

PS : SORRY FOR THE EMO POST. >.<

why?

I do care but I did not show it. I might not be the right one but I might not be totally wrong?. Yesterday during sharing, once again something strikes my mind and heart.

I am burying the problems/matters/feelings deep withing me. And is only me that know how I should feel. There is no point wondering and asking for more. Knowing that I couldn't change a person mind set maybe is because I've change however, I'm accepting it and pondering over it to have a better me. and I MUST care for others as well. I love I care I concern.
Let the word remain unsaid.

I will just remember the promises I made and not just by saying but action as well. Even if I gotta go through it myself along with God, I will because I know you too are going through alone with God. I might not be strong but I will do my best.

If only things will get better

better off this way?
I don't wish to hurt you anymore.
I wish to make myself clear of what I wan and what I'm asking for.
I don't want to confuse u either.
If we are meant to be together.. no matter how far we're separated or how long...
We will be back together.
I'm sad. I'm hurt.. U're sad, u're hurt..
I shed my tears when I'm typing this..
Even if I cant accept it.. I gotta still face it.
Am I going to be alone facing this alone? Can I take it?
Will things change?
Will things be back the same?
How long will this last?
Did you change during this period of time?
sigh...
I'm sad.
I'm really sad with what is going on with my life. I felt useless. What is happening between us?
What is the missing GAP between us?
We been through so much together ever since we met. Even though we did not know each other well enough in the beginning, but you came into my life and make colors into my life..
Is things going to be totally different because of the problems we had right in front of us now? You and I can't even figure out the reason behind all this. It just comes naturally. I'm really afraid that the happiness we have now is just temporary. I want it to be permanent to me because I chose this pathway. I've got no one else to turn too. All I can do now is to let the fingers do the talking.
Do you even remember the things we said to each other?
How long more can I take it? How long more can You take it? I believe you have ur own problems which I dont understand. I never expect you to understand me fully. I'm really tired of being the one that realize things changes super duper fast between us. Tears just flow whenever I think of it. It hurts me badly. I'm afraid all this will change the love we had for each other. I don't want this to happen.. why? sigh~ I've been emoing for the past few MONTHS thinking bout it yet it can change nth.

Who can I actually seek advise from?
Who can actually understand me now?
Dear Mr. Pillow, can u respond to me? sigh..
Dear Mr. Bear, can u respond to me? You gave me warm hug every night.. but you couldn't speak to me to give me piece of advice.. sigh~

I miss us! really I do miss Us.. ~

Till then..

Missing

Something is missing? sigh...

UPDATES!

It has been quite sometime since I lost blogged. I wonder where my blogging mood gone too. Maybe is because there is too much happening in life until I do not know how to share it here. Sorry readers especially to SHANA TEH! My loyal follower. XD

Anyway, life hasn't been really great.
Is really not easy to make decisions in life.
But one thing for sure, I am not giving up.
Even though u're thinking of leaving,
it will never makes me feeling like giving up because is not worth at all.
Do we have to keep a distance because of wat happened?
worth or not is for you to judge and for me to decide.
I know no matter wat I say it can never help because I've hurt you too deep.

For the past one week, I've not been sleeping well, my eyes is getting worse each day. Even my bro asked if my eyes is ok. A guy that hardly care about me even noticed. I guess is pretty serious already. O well, chi kei lo lei. =(


Sorry people, after so long didnt blog, wen i'm back in blogging i'm blogging about emo stuff. SORRY. sigh..

Till then...

BLAH BLAH BLAH!!
I'm out of words to express my own feelings.

Will update soon ppl... sorry.. =(

Tick tick

It has been quite sometime since I last blog.

I thought I could continue to blog after wat happened, however, I realize everytime I started
typing, the only thing I will type about is those emo stuff which I myself dare not face it. I guess
at a certain time we tend to close ourselves up and face the world alone.

IGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNORED
IGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNORED
IGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNOREDIGNORED

Ignorance is Bliss

DECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONS
DECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONS
DECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONS
DECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONSDECISIONS

Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change our life forever...

Well done is better than well said.
I'm always being told to see ACTIONS.. I am seeing.
?gniht a yas ot I ma ohw
dias neeb evah taht gniht eht rebmemer
desimorp neeb evah taht snoitca eht remember
eromyna ereht t'nsi tsurt esuaceb eromyna pu kaeps ton seod snoitca ym semitemos sseug I
emoc tsuj ti ..detnaw si taw ton si ..rof deksa si taw ton is taht eveileb od I .. eveileb I tub
emalb eb ot em si os .hguoht wonk I .. yllarutan


Dun worry..... be happy...

So...

SMILE ALWAYS...

FELICIA CHOONG NEEDS TO START STUDYING FOR HER MIDTERM!!
omg! I haven even open my book! fwahhhh.. will being on thursday!!!
I can do it! Is both easy paper but then if i dun study I will die.. IF I study.. i think i might survive!!! XD

Till then...

WORKING!

hmm..

Because I needed money so badly.. I have to work! =(

I only felt a sleep at 3.30 in the morning and I had to wake up at 4.00am to prepare myself for work! What a life.. Left the house at 4.45am headed to SS2 for Dim Sum as breakfast is pretty important for all of us that day because we wouldnt know if we even have time to have our lunch/tea time break. haha!!

After breakfast, headed straight to Sunway Convention Center.. and there we go! Off to work! wohoo~

We're the first to reach at 6.20am, so the girls decided to go to the ladies to put make up on..

Well, I hate making up.. Simply because, I am not good at it. =( How sad.. as a gal I dont know how to groom myself. WTH? HAHA!



Around 7.00am we start our work already.

busy busy busy.. bla bla bla.. working during event is not as easy as I thought especially when you came across customers that are difficult to deal with.

Overall, me enjoy myself walking here and there and meeting different people around.

CISCO!

The "goodie" bag.. haha!

ur blogger...

After work, I finally got my pay cheque! $_$

However, after calculating the amount and so on.. I realize I am seriously broke even though I just got my SALARY! WTH is this. sigh.. Hence, I decided not to join my friends for dinner and head home myself... I am freaking poor..

While waiting for my transport home...

Football mania! xD

Cute teddy! haha! grass teddy

Head to face to face for dinner to have pan mee!!

I was craving for something spicy as my mood wasn't really good.

After work, while waiting for my turn to get pay.. I felt a sleep.. in that short period of time.. I guess is just around 10 mins of nap? I can even dream.. something that I wouldn't believe..

Went I'm there.. My heart literally feel different.. Wondering around the pyramid, out of a sudden, I teared. =.= I quickly wen into the toilet. sigh.. I wonder why... I think I am freaking emo.. PMS time. >.< style="color: rgb(204, 0, 0);">SO DAM FREAKING hard to go through. Is like the clock never move. =.= sigh..

Face To Face

The chilli that make the noodle SPICE UP! wohoo~

The special pan mee that I ordered.. XD

I was freaking tired that day as I only have half an hour sleep the night before. after dinner I quickly came home and sleep! My leg was freaking pain thanks to the heels. But is all worth it because I get to earn money and pay up the debts. I am now poor. =( I wonder how am I going to survive with the amount of money I am having for another month. Work = no work. die die.. sigh... =( =( =(

till then...

All I do..

Time is not the KEY to everything.. Thanks to one of my friend. He woke me up and said..

" if your thoughts and what your heart thinks are correct don't depend everything ''on time'' "

He even told me that he is trying to learn something from me...

"learn from your smile. how to smile like real still when u don't feel good"

Indirectly, he's saying how can I put on a good fake smile in front of people... be it parents, friends or strangers.. He said is WRONG! Why wanna act? why want to carry a smile that is fake and living in the "lying" world. sigh~..
People, I do not wish to live a life like that. I just want everyone around me to be happy. I know I am a sucky fren but then.. Still I hope to see all of you all smile in front of me rather than me making you all sad and Depressed and wondering what the hack is wrong wit me. =.= sigh..


Till then...

Can I say....

I dont know how to express myself anymore..
Sigh..
I did badly in my studies.. I am now regretting.. I wish I could have chose a better road..
I handled my relationship badly.. I am now confused and in doubts! I wish I could have manage it well enough..
I am facing family stress.. I am now WORRIED.. Sad.. depressed about what is going on..
I handled my friendship badly.. I am now guilty, sad, disappointed with what is going on..

I screwed up my life.. What can I do now?
I dun think I can take it anymore..
Everynite I've been tearing over about all this.. I've been worrying having sleepless night..
I'm really afraid things will change be it family, friends, studies or relationship. I dont have the trust in myself anymore. I began to not know myself.. Is all my fault..
I guess I deserve all this..

Who am I to ask for more. Who am I to ask for less pain..

I am not giving up in praying.. I will continue to pray..
I know God is with me..

Till then...

Sorry

I'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry

If only this much of sorry can help and make you feel better..
Should I just leave u alone? SIGH~
I want to know.. How are u? will everything be alright?
I know I sux.. But yet I care.. I'm worry.. sigh

till then..

Realize

I guess.. if I could have a time machine, I would want to go back time..
Back into the time where I wouldn't have start hurting u at all knowing is so painful till now.
I finally figure out that there are things that are meant to be unsolved and just leave it. Everyone disagree with me, however, I am the one going through it. I know it more than anyone of them. I'm feeling very tired, very sick of what is going on. Not because of the "fannes" that people gave me but the hurt and sadness that I've gave to people. I felt unsafe.. I feel that I'll soon get back the same treatment that I treated others. However,
I asked myself.. Am I a failure? What I did to deserve all this Cold respond?
I feel so hopeless.. I didn't want all this to happen, yet is really out of my control. What more can I ask for but to pray for your happiness?
I did change from someone worst to someone better and now to someone that is cruel? I guess I've not been myself lately.. I wanted things to be how it was last time, however, what ever shit I do it'll never be the same anymore. Thanks to myself. I guess is all my fault seriously.. For not handling things properly and keep it hanging which is not fair.
Is not A GAME i know.. and I am QUITTING this so call game right now. I'm out of here to stop all this pain.. I am not treating anyone as a chess. It hits be with that word because I start questioning myself and asking people around me.. And I tat selfish? am I using others to get what I wan? who am I to even judge myself. sigh...
I finally know what I want. I want peace, and joy. and most importantly, I want to see happiness . Smile and laughter. That's all I'm asking for.
I am never cruel in ignoring people. I will never do that. Yes indeed it hurts me deeply went I felt the change in us.. But I am now burying it deep within myself.. because all I care for is people around me. FULL STOP here alright? no longer want to talk about it and mention about it because all it brings is just SADNESS and painful scars.. say watever you people wanna say.. Yes I wanna run! I am running away.. because I can no longer take it with the words and the things that is happening.. is just so UNPREDICTABLE.. is so out of control.. I dont wish things to turn to worst. Even an outsider can see the difference. AND OUTSIDER!. How sad is that? sigh~


till then..

Toy!

WHAT THE HELL am I thinking!
Can I stop being what I am now?
SHUT UP Felicia Choong!
I just feeling like slapping myself..
I am selfish.. When can I stop?
or should I say how can I help? sigh...

till then..

Somehow..

Somehow, I have this weird feeling in me. Feelings that I have been bothering me. I aint know how to face it.

Today is Saturday, somehow it doesn't seem like a Saturday to me. I felt so different. The time is so hard to pass somehow! o.O I wonder what's wrong. As usual, headed to GB but this time I reached late a little bit. I was so not used to it at all. =(

Had movie time with the girls since not many of them turn up and only me and Shana was there. We didnt know what to do so I brought my laptop, set up the projector and speaker and tada! the girls watch their movie. All of them were enjoying but not me. I was wondering and something is missing in me. I was emoing that time! WTH! Why again! =( But I gotta act nth because I'm with the girls and ya.. I gotta smile.. YES PPL! I am emoing in church! Sigh. =( Nobody knows the pain accept us! =(

Right after GB, hang around in church and went for a Jog with friend, we decided to Jog every sat right after our activities. I need to lose some calories! I am fat! >.<>

Miracle! =(

We actually took this reflection from a BMW car parked at the church compound. This shows how jobless we are.!!! XD I started it actually! haha

For now, I want to go for shopping! Initially, I plan to get myself another 2 new pairs of short pants however, because of the lame incident happened to me. I think I gotta delay it. =(

I need lots of stuff now. Currently, I am in need of a new fon! My current fon sux. The battery deplete like nobody business, and it hang all the time even wen I’m on the fon talking it can all of a sudden cut off my line and hang. =( The worst part is that it turns off automatically lots of time! Sigh~ Why o why. I want an IPHONE maybe! Haha.. Or perhaps I should just get a normal fon like wat one of my friend told me, money is not easy to be made. I should learn how to spend wisely and think before I spend. I was asked to imagine myself wen I’m working.. Can I survive with the way I spend the money now. =( What he said is right though.. =) hmm.. Thinking hard.. Besides that, I need a new purse!! I am trying to look for new one but so wat! I don’t have money to get it now! Sigh.. I also need a touch n go card, I need LOTS OF STUFFFFFF.. how I wish I can print marnee! =( $$ where are u! =(

To conclude the things I need to buy…

1) Phone

2) Purse

3) Short Pants + Dress + shirts!

4) New Pair of shoes! NIKE! =(

5) External Hard Disk for my dramas and movies!

6) Ipod Touch (If I’m not getting iphone)

7) ….

8) And the list goes on and on and on… ROAR!

I guess I gotta live with what I have now and gotta starve myself in uni to make sure I can save up and return all my debts ASAP! A special thanks to YOU that helped me when I’m in need of help! I’m blessed to have you as my friend. You know who u are.. I don’t need to mention here. =)

In the nite, after dinner head to SS15 for snowflakes! I was blardy craving for this!!!!

This round I added pearl inside! XD

Thanks! XD

The Beeping UFO!

LOOK! I wasn't in the mood? =( haha.. Random shot

AND TADA! England Zippo! =D

Support ENGLAND!!! XD

Till then....

POOR! Broke!

On Wednesday (9/6/10) , I woke up and received an sms asking me to go for Badminton. I straight replied yes and Off I headed to SS2 for lunch and then to PJ Challenger for badminton session. Something pretty bad happened to me. While all of us were enjoying, some stupid thief stole my stuff in my bag. The moment I got to know that my purse and my phone is gone, is already too late. I was freaking scared and I was stunted. I didnt know what else to do as I know is too late to realize and is too late to do anything. When is gone.. is gone. Nth I can do. I thank God that my friends were reliable and were very helpful. They got into the office and check out the CCTV, however, nth can be seen because the CCTV was a bit sucky due to the quality of the camera, we cant really see properly and is also because the CCTV was positioned in a way that could not really view the place where we all put our bag. I gave up hope the moment I first look at the monitor.. I wanted to walked out the room because I knew nth can be done but I didnt want my friends to worry bout me. So I just stand there and stare at the monitor. After everything, I walked out the room to be alone for a moment. I didnt want to emo at anyone because it wasn't their fault at all and they're helping me. I felt so helpless because I wasnt helping myself at all. All I did was just stare at them and waiting for them to tell me wat to do. I felt hopeless.=(

The sad part was, I guess I was pretty unlucky that day. I actually put my bag together with the rest of my friends. I guess my bag can easily be opened compare to others like badminton bag and etc.. =(
After half an hour searching high and low, finally they decided to bring me to the nearest police station. I was still freak out and didnt know what to do, so I just follow the flow. Of course I called my mom up and told her and asked her to cancel all my cards and also my fon sim.
In the police station, I realize my BM sux. I am Malaysian. C'mon.. How can I sux at my bahasa. haha! Anyway, as usual need to talk and explain to the people there wat happened, I didnt expect them to do anything as nth can actually be done. The only reason I was there is because of my IC and license. After everything headed home. I was really sad and emo. I did cried over it but then again, wat can be done after i cry? nth rite? sigh... I just take this as a lesson..ALWAYS put my fon and purse into a big bag together with the rest! =(

Anyway, I finally got my Temporary IC and my student ID done. Next is my license. I will need to take passport size pic and head to JPJ office at Permaisuri.
My Touch n Go card is gone! My dad wont get me a new one.. So I will need to get one myself. I guess I will not get one now temporary. Because I am really poor. SUPER POOOR.
My discount cards, My ATM cards.. sigh~

And not forgetting, my Pooh Bear guitar picks.!!! =(
To conclude, I think is KARMA? =( I treat ppl badly thats why.. sigh..

Till then...

....

What I'm feeling now is



..........................................................



I just feel like DOT-ing every min..

I'm out of words.

Even the blind can see that me and u have some problems in between..

But I guess I sux thats y is not worth to even talk to me. >.<

What hurt me most is the moment I tried to be normal and there isn't any response.

I guess I'm naive and yes! It hurts and I really gotta say goodbye to the past and I will need to get used to being ignore and swallow the feeling of wanting to pull this friendship back.

Follow the flow and pray.. thats all i can do now.

I know I will be emo for the next few days, weeks or may be months. Sigh..

wen can I get this over? I'm sorry...

I know my tears can never stop flowing out wenever I'm alone thinking about it.

And I know lots of ppl pity u.. and putting the blame on me.

Is because of me ur life turned miserable.

I know what I should do. *Pooof* I'm disappear from now on.

I promise.. If this helps u.. I'm happy for u..



I guess I should actually create another blog and make tat blog private and not letting people to feel tat I'm such an emo kid. and not forgetting I'm a selfish little gal. =(

(Taking in consideration)

SORRY truly sorry...

till then..

hmmmm

S.T.O.P
F.U.L.L S.T.O.P
FULL STOP
STOP
SELF CONTROL
BUT
W.H.Y?
H.A.P.P.I.N.E.S.S

BECAUSE?
♥ F._._._._._._.S ♥


WORTH?
-IDK-
BUT
A.P.P.R.E.C.I.A.T.E.D

FELICIA CHOONG
SHUT UP
*tearsdrop*
*willwalkawayleavingnth*
Let the word remain unsaid
bye

Meeting!

Is sunday!
I thought after drill competition I can rest on Sunday! =(
However, I cant! I headed up to PJ Trinity Methodist Church for meeting..
I gotta attend the meeting because I'm the secretary. I'm newbie there that know nuts and blur fella with direction-less. =(
I stoned in the meeting writing minutes and listening to issues. haha!
This is my day! yawn~
I almost had an accident today on my way home after meeting. @_@
I wasn't focus enough I guess.. sigh..
Thank God I'm safe..
There are things that bothering me inside my mind. I hope my brain can stop working and stop thinking of the same issue that bother me so much which wont make a difference at all even how hard I tried.
And maybe is cause I am stoning. Dangerous driver! =(
I regret not handling the issue well enough..
I regret for the things I have done!
But there isnt any turning back because I can't clap with one hand.
Did I try my best? I sux at handling all this.
I wanna stop hurting humans feelings. !!! =(

If only I can be as lucky as pooh to have piglet as his good friend
that can be forever there with him...
Friendship's Love

till then..